構(gòu)思點撥
上圖表現(xiàn)的是在“尚方寶劍”嚴懲的威嚴下,一位從事商業(yè)賄賂的人落荒而逃。不言而喻,這幅圖反映的是當(dāng)今一種比較猖獗的社會現(xiàn)象:商業(yè)賄賂。深層次來講,就是道德問題、責(zé)任問題。本文的內(nèi)容和結(jié)構(gòu)安排如下:
第一段:描述圖畫;第二段:從兩個角度分析影響+分析動機;第三段:建議措施。
思維拓展
此類文章可以展開的角度有:金錢觀,商業(yè)道德建設(shè)、職業(yè)道德建設(shè),公平競爭。相似的圖片比比皆是。請參考下圖:
高分范文
There is no doubt that this cartoon vividly depicts a negative but rampant scenario in modern society: commercial bribery. Frightened by the sharp punishment sword, the man, carrying a large pile of money used as bribery①, is trying his best to escape. What is conveyed by the drawing is both realistic and thought-provoking.
The implication of the given picture can be elaborated in terms of the decline of work-moral values and the view on money. For one thing, commercial bribery has a very damaging and destructive② effect on the whole society. Firstly, moral deficiencies as well as the humanity weakness revealed in the action of bribery③ may stain and pollute the atmosphere of professional ethics and cause others to copy. Secondly, fair competition may be threatened because bribery puts honest businessmen at a disadvantaged position. For another, the bad behavior of commercial bribery is largely driven by “profit”, showing that those people who are involved in bribery do not have a right view on money. It is true that money is indispensable④, but, there is no denying that money should be obtained and spent in a reasonable, wise and legitimate way.
To eliminate the immoral behavior of bribery thoroughly⑤, drastic actions should be taken and severe punishment measures should be adopted. Besides, a positive mental guidance on the right attitude to money should be popularized among the public. Only in this way can we have a fair and sound social environment.
佳作妙譯
毫無疑問這幅漫畫生動地描述了現(xiàn)代社會一種負面的但是卻十分猖獗的現(xiàn)象:商業(yè)賄賂。由于懼怕嚴厲的懲罰,這個人背著一大堆賄賂用的錢落荒而逃。漫畫的寓意是十分現(xiàn)實并發(fā)人深思的。
上圖的寓意可以理解為詳細闡述了在金錢沖擊下職業(yè)道德的淪陷。一方面,商業(yè)賄賂對全社會造成惡劣的、毀滅性的影響。首先在賄賂行為中表現(xiàn)出的道德缺陷和人性弱點會破壞和污染職業(yè)道德的氛圍,不良分子也會效仿。其次,行賄者將破壞公平競爭,誠信經(jīng)營的商人被置于不利地位。另一方面,商業(yè)賄賂行為大多是被利益驅(qū)動的,這說明這些人對金錢沒有正確的態(tài)度。沒有金錢的確是萬萬不能的,但對待金錢,無疑需要取之有道,用之有度。
為了徹底根除賄賂這種道德敗壞的行為,應(yīng)該采取嚴厲的懲罰措施。另外,應(yīng)該在公眾中逐漸普及正確的金錢觀。只有這樣,我們才能擁有公平、健全的社會環(huán)境。
名師點評
① money used as bribery: 過去分詞作定語=定語從句。
寫過去分詞做定語的步驟:
第一步:寫成定語從句:money which is used as bribery;
第二步:省略引導(dǎo)詞“which”和be動詞“is”變成money used as bribery.
這樣,一個定語從句就變成了過去分詞做定語。
② damaging and destructive: 近義詞疊用,押韻:頭韻
③ revealed in the action of bribery: 過去分詞作定語,修飾前面的moral deficiencies as well as the humanity weakness,寫法參考本文點評第① 條。
④ It is true that money is indispensable: It作形式主語,真正的主語是that從句。
⑤ To eliminate the immoral behavior of…: 為了……作目的狀語。