提升托福寫作水平-對中式英文說“NO!”

對很多中國托?？忌鷣碚f，寫作實際上是個翻譯過程，如何把思想中的中文轉化成現(xiàn)實中的英文是托?；A寫作關心的問題，也是學生們首要應該解決的問題。但是我們的學生受思維定式的影響，如果在新托福寫作中套漢語思維，就是中式化英語的表現(xiàn)。這只能使文章語言蹩腳、冗贅。所以考生在托福寫作備考時，要注意英語表達和漢語表達的差別，重要的一點是托福寫作應避免中式英文。

1、Original: If we agree to say that school offers us the best book knowledge acquisition then our society offers us the best surviving techniques in a hard way.

Revised: If we agree that school offers the best method for the acquisition of book knowledge, then our society offers us the best method for acquiring common sense or “street smarts”.

Agree to say that表達中式化，只需要agree that即可;the best book knowledge acquisition改為the best method for the acquisition of book knowledge(學校給我們提供了獲取書本知識的好方法)更為恰當 ，同樣后面的the best surviving techniques改為the best method for acquiring common sense,加上street marks(街頭智慧)給文章的托福詞匯增添色彩。

2、Original: They can spend more time studying education and communication to improve their role as a mother, wife and daughter.

Revised: They can also decide to spend more time studying, education themselves, in order to improve themselves in their roles as mothers, wives and daughters.

原句中studying education and communication的說法中式化，不符合英語的表述，應該為studying，educating themselves。除了詞語表達，此句中還存在其他問題，如名詞單復數(shù)的使用：不是提高他們的角色，而是提高他們自身以扮演好母親角色。

還有，女性不止一個人。很多人都在扮演母親角色，role和mother應用復數(shù)，故將improve their role as a mother改為improve themselves in their roles as mother;同樣，為保持一致，wife和daughter也可用復數(shù)，原文中wife的復數(shù)寫法有誤，應該是wives。

3、Original：If you can get the point of communication by watching TV，will you...?

Revised：If one can learn about communicating from television，will you...?

原句的get the point of communication by watching TV表達不清，讓人難以理解，應該是指“從電視上學習交際”：learn about communicating from television.